Restoring connection, with yourself and others 

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You may long for connection, yet find that relationships keep getting complicated. Perhaps you notice the same patterns repeating themselves, or you feel that you lose yourself in relationships or parenthood, while trying to keep everything going.  Many of these patterns develop early in life and continue to influence  how we relate to others and ourselves. In my practice, I have been successfully supporting people since 2017 who find themselves stuck in recurring relationship patterns, attachment-related struggles and the search for greater autonomy in their relationships and interactions with others. Therapy is available in Dutch or English. I regularly work with international clients and expats living in The Netherlands.

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You might recognize some of the following: 

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- you are afraid of losing someone and therefore tend to adapt yourself

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- you keep people at a distance when a relationship becomes too close

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- you often find yourself giving too much or taking on too much responsibility in relationships

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- you struggle to express your own needs or boundaries, and you might have become stressed-out, hypervigilant or burnt-out

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- you have been single for a while and still long for a relationship

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- you notice the same dynamics repeating themselves in your interactions with others

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- you have a difficult relationship with one or both of your parents and long to find a sense of peace with it

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- since becoming a parent, you sometimes feel you are losing yourself, especially if your child has specific needs or a particular temperament

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- difficulties have arisen in your current relationship and you would like to work on achieving a better dynamic, either alone or together

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- you have been in a relationship where manipulation, control or emotional insecurity affected your sense of self-worth

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Many of these patterns are rooted in the way we learned to connect with others during childhood and subsequent experiences. For example, when there was little space for your own feelings, or when you carried too much responsibility at a young age, this can continue to shape your relationships later on in life.

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In therapy, we explore these underlying dynamics together. By gaining insight into these patterns, space gradually emerges to make different choices and to live and relate more from a place that feels true to yourself. 

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The goal is not to 'fix' yourself, for you are not broken, but to better understand what is happening within you. From there, more calmness, autonomy and equality in relationships, and within yourself, can develop.

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If this resonates with you, feel free to get in touch for an initial consultation. Please see the practical information page for details.

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